New Year Part II - "Love is the Fabric of Life"

The excitement of a new year brought me to New York City. I had gone with hopes of feeling rejuvenated and plans to refocus. I had started to feel the effects of leaving everything that became my life in weeks prior and had definitely needed a spark. It would be the first time my sister and I were able to spend New Years together in our adult lives. We decided that standing in Times Square wasn't really conducive to the attire we were planning...typical girls I suppose. Instead, we opted for the Bootleggers Ball in Brooklyn, thanks to Diz.

After running the streets of New Haven, CT to catch the Metro North (and absolutely making it), Krissy and I were on our way to the big city. For the record, I will admit that it was more than likely my fault we were running late. Fashionably late doesn't really work well for public transportation, and I see the importance in probably improving at that. I figure I have a long enough list at the present moment, I'll save that for a resolution during a boring year.

Stepping my little 3 1/2" boot heels onto the streets of New York City did just as I had expected. There is something about the city that I can't really explain. Its a fire inside my little soul reminding me that I am bigger than what my prior surroundings provided me. Whether it be the inspiration to dream bigger, the smell of street side vendors, or the energy it provides, it gets me. I love NY and NY loves me.


This is what we walked into.

It was like we stepped back into the 20s.

It was fantastic.

Head ornaments of all sorts, men actually dressed nicely, not the lame version most men think is nice in our day. Good spirits and great people surrounding us.



I was excited for a new year, even though I had grown to finally appreciate what 2009 brought me. With my party dress, a string of pearls, and my own little head ornament, I set out for what would be the only way I envisioned ringing in 2010.

(pictured left to right: Krissy, Me, Nadine, Rachel)

Champagne flowed, laughter shared, memories made. For us 4 girls, this night all meant the same in each of our own very different ways.

Rachel had convinced me to get my tarot cards read. She had explained the importance of positive energy, and how it directly reflects the reading provided. It was just past midnight, the ball had dropped, it had officially become the new year. It wasn't going to get more positive than this. I had so much to look forward to...and at this moment, that's all I could think about.

Its amazing what a stranger can say, and how easily it can affect your life. I had sat down, and cut the deck, just as she instructed. She glanced at the cards, looked up at me, and shook her head in disapproval. What...am I dying? How bad can this get?

She had told me she saw turmoil and heartache. That there was a relationship lost (notice the emperor card) with either my father or a lover....considering my daddy is still my daddy, lets assume the latter. She talked about a heavy weight I carry, that I assume I have to lift on my own. That I continue to be strong and that I don't let myself grieve. That I long for love and fulfillment, but have made positive steps towards accomplishing that. (Trust me, at this point, I was waiting for the good news) She explained how important my inner strength is to me, and how whatever steps I am taking to better myself will payoff. She talked about my new desire to get it down, for the universe to read. I was entertained by that, considering this book venture of mine. That I need to communicate above me, not always in me...and that no matter how my heart cries, for whatever it was going through, Love is life. And Love is the fabric of life.

There was no denying what she told me affected me. I had looked across the table at a perfect stranger and wondered how in the hell she got all that from me cutting the deck a few times. She looked back across the table, stood up, and gave me a hug. I said "gosh I needed that", to which she responded, "I know".

Maybe this is something I will do again, just to see if the cards change. Whether a tarot card reading is something to be valued or not, it inspired me. Love is life, and love carries you through life. Hate holds love, resentment holds love, anger holds love. In a world so cold, so angry and violent, there is still love somewhere that keeps it going.

Too often we put so much emphasize on "love" being found and lost in romantic relationships, that we lose all of the other aspects of our life love is found. Its in the stranger holding the door open, in the one smile that makes a bad day better. Its the mothers brush of your hair that calms a fear. The taste of something delicious. Its the laughter shared between friends. The memories from childhood scars. Its the plans to grow old with someone. Its in a child telling you they love you. Its in the pride of an accomplishment.

Love is the string, the bond, the fabric that hold all of our lives together.

Oh New York, it is you I love...you continue to inspire me.